Lords and Ladies, 
a noble effort 
has been made; 
but you no longer have to 
peer at titles 
and count.  

In the challenge to find Colin Firth film titles in my excerpt, one reader has been elevated to the 
upper class and will receive a Jane Austen tote bag, a Mr. Darcy/Colin Firth poster, and a set of four pins.  

I extend a very warm welcome to everyone traveling by post this Touring Thursday.  Thanks for making my place a rest stop on your tour.  I’m truly honoured to be included on the Austenesque Extravaganza roster. Kudos to Meredith Esparza, extravaganza executor extraordinaire, for putting together this tour de force.  When Labour Day rolls around, Meredith, I hope you'll take a fond look back at this august labour of love.  

For a change, this is going to be a serious blog post.  Those who know me at Austen Authors may doubt my sincerity (and perhaps my sanity); but, you’ll see.

I’ve been taking a fond look back at my own labour of love and doing so with both joy and sorrow.  The story that became Mr. Darcy Takes the Plunge was, in a way, a catharsis.  The process of writing the silly story and having it published helped me cope with the loss of a most beloved sister, my only sibling.  The book’s dedication is in her memory and in that of Jane Austen.  (See. I can do serious, although I think neither my sister nor Jane Austen would object to a posthumous humorous post.)  

My introduction to Austen came in a roundabout way, but it does not lessen my appreciation for her tremendous talent.  It began with the film Bridget Jones’s Diary, in which Mark Darcy was handsome enough to tempt me.  Consequently I became excessively attentive to the 1995 BBC version of P&P, followed by reading, and then extensive re-reading, of Austen’s novels.  But I was left wanting more - especially more Darcy and Elizabeth and more Wentworth and Anne.  

There are numerous Annes in my book - Anne de Bourgh, Lady Anne Darcy, Miss Anna Darcy, Ann Cillary, et al.  It is a truth universally acknowledged that an Austenesque author in want of a quotation would typically choose one by Austen.  As some of you may know, I am not your typical writer. I’ve chosen a passage by Lucy Maud Montgomery instead.  Earlier this month, I visited Prince Edward Island and was reminded of a quote by another Anne - the one in Anne of Green Gables.  I believe Anne Shirley’s opinion is also apt for the Austenesque community. 

“Kindred spirits are not so scarce as I used to think.  
It’s splendid to find out there are so many of them in the world.”

Indeed.  In want of more Darcy and Elizabeth, I hit the motherlode when I discovered published what-ifs, re-imaginings, prequels, sequels, and adaptations.  Then I found on-line JAFF (Jane Austen Fan-fiction).  Those kindred spirits were kind and generous, and I am so very glad I found my way there.  Many writers featured in Meredith’s month-long Extravaganza began by posting stories at JAFF sites, as did I.  

So, I thank all my kindred spirits - those who cannot get enough of Austen’s characters - writers and readers alike.  I especially appreciate those who have graciously put up with my jokes and wordplay.  Groan-worthy puns are not everyone’s cup of tea (Earl Grey, hot).  As a formerly obsessed Trekker, I believe in the Vulcan IDIC philosophy (Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations).  Within the pages of Austenesque authors’ novels, there’s a JA-inspired story to suit everyone’s taste - from zombies and vampires to wild and wanton romance - from the Regency era to modern times.  Why, there are even stories inspired by the handsome actors who portrayed Mr. Darcy in various film adaptations … which finally brings us to my contest.   

Within a chapter of Mr. Darcy Takes the Plunge, there are names of films in which a certain British actor appeared.  (Hint: He portrayed Darcy in 1995's Pride and Prejudice.)  The excerpt found here has been edited and updated especially for today’s Austenesque Extravaganza.  (Really, it's obvious I'm just trying to get into Meredith’s Austenesque Reviews' good books.)

Count all the actor’s works you can detect, and email your answer to jmariecroft@gmail.com. Those with the correct number will have their names entered in a draw.  

The prize is this Jane Austen canvas tote bag,   

                        set of four pins,

and a poster of Mr. Darcy (who, quite coincidentally, bears a remarkable resemblance to a certain British actor). 

The titles include some of his less-known work, a couple recently completed films, a TV movie, a TV mini-series, and a film aka The Hour of the Pig.  He really has quite a body of work.  Lately he’s been in one great movie after another.  You might say he’s on a role.   

E-mailed entries will be accepted until 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time) August 25/11.  One winner will be randomly drawn from all entries with correct answers.  If no one arrives at the right number, I might have to Colin Firther entries.  (No.  If that happens, the draw will be made from entries with the closest guess.)  On August 26 I’ll email the winner and announce their name (and the correct answer) here on this blog.  At that time I’ll also indicate the titles in red throughout the excerpt in case anyone's interested.

But, wait!  That’s not all.  Although you have to email me to enter my contest, please remember to also complete Meredith’s Amazing Austenesque Giveaway form.  There are other exemplary prizes to be had, and the only way to win those is by leaving a comment.

I hope comments are not so scarce as I used to think.  
It would be splendid to find out there are so many of them left by kindred spirits in the Austenesque world.  
  

Blissfully unaware they were soon to receive an unwelcome visitor, Mrs. Bennet and her two eldest daughters were in the sitting room of their London townhouse busily choosing ribbons, beading, and other trimmings suitable for the brides’ trousseaux. The fact that Jane and Elizabeth had made very eligible matches and were truly in love with their husbands-to-be was, of course, deeply satisfying to their mother. Most gratifying was the undeniable fact the gentlemen returned their affection tenfold. However, Mrs. Bennet realized she would be quite melancholy when it finally came time to part with her dear girls; that said, having three more daughters and a son still under her care was, in some measure, a comfort. The woman could not image how bereft she would feel when the last child had finally flown the nest.

“Mama, are you crying?” A soft voice roused Mrs. Bennet, and she suddenly realized Jane knelt in front of her and had reached to clasp her hand.

“Most certainly not, my dear. Good heavens, why would I have occasion to weep? Is this not every mother’s fondest wish ... to be planning her daughter’s wedding? I have been doubly blessed with the duty of overseeing the production of not one but two trousseaux, which, of course, would be incomplete without: ‘Dresses for breakfasts, and dinners, and balls; Dresses to sit in, and stand in, and walk in; Dresses to dance in, and flirt in, and talk in; Dresses in which to do nothing at all; Dresses for Winter, Spring, Summer, and Fall.’”2

“Speaking of all these purchases of attire, it is fortunate Papa’s own clothing has rather deep pockets,” said Lizzy.

A modiste in the city was already at work on the young ladies’ wedding clothes. When she had been needled for a completion date, the woman had hemmed and hawed before replying. “I am only doing sew-sew. I toile day and night, and eye-let my assistant, Velvet, do the crewel embroidery work. But the darn thread, together with the tight fit of the bodices, causes much seam-stress. I will not embellish the truth but must tack on a few extra days. So awl things considered, I have a notion you may pin your hopes on the garments being ready five days before the wedding.” The Bennet ladies had quickly cott-on to the dressmaker’s wordplay; and, without bias, they baste their trust on Mrs. Lovelace and Velvet.


 2  From William Allen Butler’s “Nothing to Wear”

Dogs, cats, horses, and other animals play important roles in Mr. Darcy Takes the Plunge; and throughout my life, pets have always been considered family members.  

As a child, I wanted to be a veterinarian until I discovered the necessity and frequency of surgery and euthanasia.  In Grade 10 Biology there was no way I was cutting open that frog! I have the greatest respect and admiration for veterinarians. They perform those surgeries and euthanasias to relieve animals’ suffering.  

Molly, our beloved Border Collie received excellent and compassionate care from our vet, who cried with us while we all said goodbye.  

Here are some of the critters in Mr. Darcy Takes the Plunge:

Pug-Nacious (Pug puppy)
Dust Bunny (Maltese puppy)
Barbara Thorne (hedgehog)
Herr Stewart (rabbit)
Rex and Regina (Dalmations)
Geoffrey Canterbury Tail & Chaucer Cantering Burybones (Italian Greyhounds)
Romulus and Remus (Foxhounds)
Cato, the Philoso-fur (ginger kitten)
Balthasar (Gordon Castle Setter-English Setter crossbreed puppy)
Khaldun Kahleil (grey Arabian stallion)
Majeed (grey Arabian colt)
Sharifa (Arabian filly)
Gloriana (sorrel mare)
Zephyr (gelding)

Excerpt from Mr. Darcy Takes the Plunge (Elizabeth Bennet):

“... Mama and Papa have never permitted us to have animals in our residence. Hmm, I wonder whether they are concerned about household pets taking over the world. Why the puzzled look, Mr. Darcy? Have you never heard of reigning cats and dogs?”

In this excerpt from Mr. Darcy Takes the Plunge, the title character and Charles Bingley are discussing the latter’s sister (Caroline) and snobbery.
     

“This sounds serious, indeed, Darcy. Please be assured you have my full attention, cooperation, and continual friendship, whatever dire information you are about to impart.”

“This is difficult to say, and I realize it is not my place to do so. Despite that, something must be done about your sister. One of these days she is going to go too far and offend the wrong person. You jokingly described her as snobby, snooty, and snotty; however, it is no joke, my friend. Miss Bingley truly is a snob; and I certainly do not allude to the slang that I realize may have been hurtful to you while at Cambridge.”

“Darcy, I am not ashamed of my background. For many generations our ancestors were cobblers. Caroline and I do, absolutely, owe our current prosperity to a bunch of shoemakers. I know the origin of the word ‘snob’ started as the nickname for a cobbler or his apprentice. It also meant tradesman, merchant, townsman, or basically any person of low class. I am not ignorant to the fact ‘snob’ is now beginning to mean one who imitates their betters. You and your relatives have always been our betters, yet you have never looked down upon us, my friend; and I thank you for that.”

I recently wrote a blog post about how the writing of this story was similar to doing a jigsaw puzzle.  Sometimes pieces just fell into place with little effort.  The above passage is a prime example.  I had already determined the Bingley siblings’ fortune had come from the manufacture of footwear.  Why I chose such a background is beyond my recollection now, but it probably had something to do with the pun potential.  Then when I started to write this scene, I did a little research into the word ‘snob’.  Imagine my surprise and delight to discover its origin.